You've Gotta Be Kidding Me?!?

So yesterday, I had a meeting with the superintendant of the school I teach at. He talked to me for 15 minutes about the ideal structure of middle school and that he was so happy that the middle school teachers are finally a team (which has apparently been a problem for the past few years). He said he is so pleased that the 6th, 7th and 8th grade teachers work so well together and that it is obvious that the students are benefitting from it...Great! I thought, Glad I can be a part of that! Then he dropped the bomb. The school has to cut $100,000 in expenses for next year..."unfortunately, Rachel, your salary is one of the expenses."
Excuse me?
So after 15 minutes of praise and encouragement I'm thinking...sweet! He's going to offer me a raise! Nope...not the case.
Now, after 1 amazing year at Stillwater, I am back on the job market...of course, this is the worst time to be looking for a job. Not just a teaching job...ANY job! Ideally, I would love to stay home with baby and if we could make it work I would...(maybe this is God's way of telling me that He wants me to work as a mommy instead of a teacher) I just don't think we could make it work financially...plus...after paying (and still paying) thousands of dollars to be a teacher...I am NOT ready to give that up! Teaching for a year certainly confirmed the fact that I LOVE LOVE LOVE my profession and I truly do want to work!
So far, I have gone through the whole gammet of emotions. I was super sad and felt like a failure...although I have been assured by many coworkers that it has NOTHING to do with my performance...I am simply the newest employee and lowest on the totem pole:( Then I was just plain mad...I was so angry at the administration...why me? I'm a good teacher, I devoted so much time, energy and emotion to my job and I KNOW I did it well! Finally, after being angry, I feel like I am starting to accept it and now I just think it's silly.
It doesn't hurt to have the most amazing husband in the world either! He has made sure that I know that it's the school's loss, has nothing to do with my teaching and that no matter what, we will make it work. He also said something that made a lot of sense and really made me think...he said that I need to look at all the amazing things I have gotten out of this 1 year. The great friends I have made, the experience and the fact that teaching at a Christian school has strengthened my faith, brought me to a new, amazing church and taught me a whole lot about what it means to be a Christian. As I think about what he said, I realize, he is so right. No matter what, it will work out! I am confident in myself and I thank God that I have such a supportive and amazing family
So right now, I will just finish out the school year (at least until I go into labor), take care of myself and baby (that's more important than any job) and thank God for what He is blessing me with right now.
Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.
James 1:2-4
I also can't help but think about Paul writing to the people of Philippi while he was locked in prison. He was so joyful and eager to share what he knew. I can't imagine being locked in prison and being constantly joyful...I am the one who cringes when I meet people like that:) In Paul's letter to the Philippians, he says:
Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice! Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your mind in Christ Jesus.
Philippians 4: 4-7
Thanks to my family for all the support, love and encouragement! I couldn't do it without you!

Photoshoot

I had a good friend of mine come take belly pictures of Shane, baby and me on Saturday. We did some at the house and some at the lake in Whitefish...it was really fun and she got some great shots! I am so happy with how they turned out and they will be great memories to keep forever! Thanks Elenie!